“So, what’s next?”
often followed by…
“What do/will you do?” (i.e. for a job/money)
If you ask us these questions you will likely be dissatisfied with the answer. From me, you will receive a mumble and confused look. JB will mention something about taking the Washington state bar exam in a couple weeks. Reasonably, the next question is, “So you want to be a lawyer?” or “You want to live in Washington?”. Then there is some explanation about how the prep course he paid for right out of law school was going to expire so he had to take the exam somewhere to not loose $1000, and we figured he would do it in the Pacific Northwest because I love the mountains and he loves the ocean.
We don’t have a plan. Well, not what most would consider a plan… we have an idea, that might materialize day of…or might not.
The boat is currently docked behind his parent’s home in Fort Myers, FL. Where it will remain until we return from Seattle. We leave for Washington on July 19th and don’t have return tickets. Moments from clicking the “Confirm” button on American Airlines website, JB insisted I hold on. Minutes later I received an email, subject line “This doesn’t make more sense than renting and flying back, does it?”
Inside was a link that confirmed my boyfriend’s insanity. Another craigslist van. Well, maybe an RV. Good joke I thought, as my eyes revealed my thoughts on such potential foolishness. (Our last van landed into a tree at 45mph after it’s breaks went out while going downhill). JB was across the state when I received the email, so I had to call him and express my concern at such an idea (since he couldn’t see my eyes). But upon hanging up, it was he who had convinced me. It didn’t take much effort on his behalf, after all, carsickness is much more manageable than seasickness.
If I’m being completely honest, I much prefer travelling via road as opposed to ocean. Mainly because I don’t get as sick. But also because, as a vegan, it was hard for me to get proper nutrition on the boat (my wounds weren’t healing, among other issues – this was because of lack of food options in the islands). In a van we don’t have to do overnight passages, its a big plus to cuddle up together every night and not worry about your partner on deck. Maybe most importantly for my physical sanity is the fact that yoga is much more accessible as a vanner. I went almost 7 weeks on the boat without a consistent physical practice and everything hurt. Not to mention, I was a tad cranky at times. Thankfully, I have the most understanding partner on this planet. He knows all these things and takes them to heart; is willing to forego his dreams so that both of us can be the best version of ourselves. Although I still see the boat in our future, even if I can’t tell you what the exact plan is for it.
Ahimsa will be renovated once we get back from Seattle: pretty new cushioning, rebuilt engines, some new flooring, deep cleaning and waxing. And if we find a place we like on the Pacific coast, we will sail her on over! But we might get back from Washington and decide to move to Nicaragua, so don’t hold your breath.
Given how much I don’t know about what we are doing these upcoming months, I do know a couple certainties…working a 9-5 desk job is hard. I applaud those that do it, and even more, I truly believe there are those whose life passion involves sitting at a desk nine hours a day. Upon graduating college, that is what I did. I sat, sent emails, ran models, collected data, presented results, and attended an occasional meeting (if it couldn’t be avoided). I even enjoyed the work, the engineering work that is, it was challenging and rewarding in its own way, but nothing is that interesting for nine hours. Furthermore, my contribution was fed into the corporate machine, and I think Thoreau relays my sentiments best, “a corporation has no conscience; but a corporation of conscientious men is a corporation with a conscience.” What if the men aren’t conscientious? I didn’t want to stick around any longer and find out. And all the sitting. Some employees had standing desks and Pilates balls in place of their ergonomically friendly chair, but immobility kills. While working in Alaska, I was doing more yoga than I had ever done before and I still couldn’t keep up with the effects of immobility on my muscles and joints. JB believed that sitting at desk was harder on his body than the amount of library sitting he did while in Law school, which was a lot. He too just finished a desk job, where he enjoyed the work; but not moving for extended periods of time can lead someone (especially people very in tune with their bodies) to feel like they are withering away.
It’s not just the physical body, my mind, after thinking critically for nine hours a day, was mush. I would get home and not want to talk, or think. I would rather watch reruns of modern family than read a book, sometimes even cooking became burdensome if I had to follow a recipe. Picking weeds from my garden was the most enjoyable task. Being mindful is the essence of yoga. Mindful of how you treat yourself, interact with others, of what you put in your body, how you contribute to society, mindful of your words and thoughts and actions. Enough practice of continuous mindfulness creates patterns of Ahimsa (non-violence), these are the patterns I want in my life. What patterns was I contributing to when plopping on a couch, eating a can soup, stressing about work, not responding to friend’s texts or mom’s calls because I just didn’t want to think, I didn’t want to engage with life? Not the patterns I envisioned for myself in life. So I made a choice, a choice that was right for me, I am by NO MEANS saying quitting your 9-5 job is the ONLY right way to live a happier, kinder, more conscientious life. For me, it was the right time
I do know if I try and plan out every little detail there is no room for spontaneity, for accepting what the universe has to offer.
Some may say we are part of, nay, the epitome of the entitled millennial generation: too free, too out-of-control… I’ll leave Jack Johnson with the last word, as I often do…
Are we free or afraid
Of what we’re told?
Are we out of or under control?
I’ll prob post about road tripping, if it happens. ❤